![\"Snapshot](\"http:\/\/www.wangao.org\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/Snapshot-_-Junglas-de-Zima-Isla-Mariposa-92-171-40-Moder.png\")
<\/a>\nIs it a big vulo or a tiny pygmy?<\/em><\/small><\/p>\n
This tale is quite short…. as befits its main character…. but I hope will entertain, based as it is on a true story although names have been changed to protect the idiots ….i mean innocents<\/p>\n
It was the custom of adahi (a kindly hearted but not entirely brave or sensible kajira) to wander the jungles when her chores were done (which was rare since the Huntresses of Na Wow, lovely as they are, do like their luxuries)
\nBut sometimes, just sometimes, once bosk and sheared and vulo milked, when bread is roasted and cupcakes toasted\u2026\u2026\u2026. Then adahi can wander<\/p>\n
And wander she does\u2026\u2026.from the northern shores where the sap trees grow strong and the tabuk graze beneath (although vulo tend to lie about with arrows in tummies) down south to the river that runs deep and wide through jungles, the surface deceptively calm which hides the hazards below\u2026\u2026\u2026.the weeds that tangle stray limbs\u2026\u2026.. the creatures \u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026.the sleen\u2026.<\/p>\n
As she enters the jungles of Schnedi her senses strain \u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026.seeking the slightest sound\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026.. a colour\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026..a pattern of leaves that does not fit
\nSlowly she leaves the water\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026movements controlled and studied so as not to make a splash or draw attention\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026fingers always hovering over her slingshot<\/p>\n
One footstep at a time she leaves the water\u2026.pushing through the reeds, the thick, gloopy, smelly mud squelching between her pale toes
\nPausing on the river bank she listens again\u2026\u2026\u2026hearing the birds\u2026\u2026\u2026the wind in the branches\u2026\u2026.the distant cry of a jungle panther
\nSlowly the idea that all is well seeps into her brain and she sets off southwards, following the path past the old fort that creeps her out and on past the cave where the palm wine brews.<\/p>\n
STOP!
\nSomething is wrong<\/p>\n
The girl drops to a crouch and listens. The jungles are silent. Not a bird \u2026.not an animal stirs
\n\u2026\u2026.then a mighty CRASH echoes over the jungles from the south east, birds rise screeching into the warm air, their iridescent plumage flashing across the skies like fireworks, a jungle cat races through the undergrowth fur like flames in the fiery afternoon sun.<\/p>\n
After some time adhahi lifts her face from the mud of the river bank and peers out through the rence and her eyelashes
\nWiping the occasional worm from her face and hair she heads south again, towards the source of the sound and commotion
\nThe girl pauses at the junction of the four tribes …………her head moving side to side as she listens\u2026.the movements helping to keep earrings from blocking ears<\/p>\n
First she looks towards Eck Ven and their sacred island where it is death for a kajira to set foot but all is quiet for a change.<\/p>\n
Next her head swings right looking toward Koti and glancing over the standing stones that rise mysteriously from the higher ground but again there is no sound from that direction<\/p>\n
East and South discounted the girl looks to the towering mountain upon which the tribe of Zimwer built their fortress and shivers slightly sensing all is not right<\/p>\n
The girl moves silently through the shallows, slender limbs slipping through the water with barely a ripple
\nEver closer to the Zimmer fort the girl edges, nervously now as the clamour of combat reaches her ears\u2026..strange blood curdling cries mixed with sounds that can only be described as animal like
\nCloser<\/p>\n
The girl pressed herself against the rough timbers of the palisade, her breast heaving to pull in air to recover from the climb. Ooooooooooh
\nSlowly recovering she peers round the corner to be greeted by a sight that could have been drawn from ancient Greek or Egyptian mythology
\nIn a sun dappled earthen glade within the camp a mighty warrior stands, blade in her hands, skin glistening with the sweat of combat, her hair cascading down her toned and sun bronzed back until it flares outwards lifted by the swell of an unmistakeable bum\u2026\u2026.For it is the fabled Warrior and scourge of the taverns …. i mean jungles….. Blom the Barbarian<\/p>\n
Before her stands her adversary, equal in size and ferocity, lethally armed and advancing with intent to disembowel the brave pygmy<\/p>\n
But Blom is made of stern stuff, forged in the fire of combat, fearless in the face of even the largest Vulo<\/p>\n
She takes the fighting stance\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026 drawing on her many, many, many, many years of cooking \u2026I mean \u2026\u2026.training she adopts the ninja position, blade held over her head as the mighty chicken approaches<\/p>\n
The fearsome beast strikes, huge beak stabbing like an assegai straight at the ample breast of the Warrior…..fast…..hard….. a killing blow<\/p>\n
Weaving (intentionally \u2026. and not as some might think from the effects of paga) Blom dodges the potentially fatal blow and laughs in the face of danger as the ground trembles from the impact.
\nYelling with glee she brings down her sword with all her might on the now exposed neck of the beast and turns to ahadi …. err…..adahi……with the flourish of the victor.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat is how it is done cupcake\u201d she says with no small amount of pride in her voice which turns to a stunned \u201cEEEEEEEEErk\u201d as the vulo swatted her hard over the back of the head with a ginormous wing before shaking its head to dislodge the blade that had been stopped by the thick feathers.<\/p>\n
\u201cBloody armour plated chicken\u201d Blom muttered<\/p>\n
Cackling in an ever so slightly sinister and not at all mad way Blom backed away\u2026\u201dyou is so gonna be mcnuggets bird\u201d she said as she passed the puzzled kajira<\/p>\n
Then turning she ran, jumping down from the walls of Zimmer fort causing a major tsunami in nearby islands as her bum hit the ground with the percussion of a small bomb
\nAs the trembling of the ground gradually ceased ahadi uncovered her head to hear faint in the breeze “I will be back bird….
\n…with mayo”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
It was the custom of adahi (a kindly hearted but not entirely brave or sensible kajira) to wander the jungles when her chores were done (which was rare since the Huntresses of Na Wow, lovely as they are, do like their luxuries)
\nBut sometimes, just sometimes, once bosk and sheared and vulo milked, when bread is roasted and cupcakes toasted\u2026\u2026\u2026. Then adahi can wander<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1692,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[17],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1691","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-stories"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.wangao.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1691","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.wangao.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.wangao.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.wangao.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.wangao.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1691"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"http:\/\/www.wangao.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1691\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1720,"href":"http:\/\/www.wangao.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1691\/revisions\/1720"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.wangao.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/1692"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.wangao.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1691"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.wangao.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1691"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.wangao.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1691"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}